Finding My Ground (and Maybe Doing Some Jumping Jacks) in the Parenting Journey

Parenting an energetic and curious 9-year-old continues to be an adventure, full of unexpected twists and turns. Like many of us navigating parenthood, especially in these often-turbulent times within our country, I'm constantly seeking ways to stay grounded and respond to my son with patience and understanding.

One thing I've come to appreciate deeply is the power of physical activity as a tool for emotional regulation – not just for me, but as a concept I'm trying to model. This realization really hit home years ago, when my son was three. In a moment of overwhelming frustration, I did something completely out of character: I roared at him like a dinosaur. The immediate result was surprise, but it certainly wasn't the kind of interaction I wanted to define our relationship.

Around that time, I was exploring the science behind our emotional responses. The work of Dr. Dan Siegel highlighted how stress can lead to us "flipping our lid," where our emotional brain takes over and our capacity for rational thought diminishes. I recognized my dinosaur moment as a prime example of my own "reptilian brain" taking charge!

Interestingly, Dr. Siegel also emphasized the powerful link between exercise and our ability to access higher-level thinking. It's a quick and effective way to shift our state and prevent those impulsive reactions. While a three-year-old's brain is still developing the areas responsible for self-regulation, as adults, we have the capacity to consciously choose a different response.

So, while the urge to react impulsively can still arise (even with a now nine-year-old!), I'm learning to recognize those moments earlier. Instead of letting my inner dinosaur take over, I'm trying to incorporate small bursts of physical activity. A few deep breaths paired with some jumping jacks, a quick walk around the block, or even just a moment of stretching can make a surprising difference in my ability to stay present and respond calmly.

This idea of using movement for regulation is something the parenting group I have become a part of has also touched upon. In our discussions of the book "Raising Good Humans" by Hunter Clarke-Fields, we explore practical strategies for navigating the daily challenges of raising children in today's world. The focus isn't always on specific parenting techniques, but often on our own well-being and how our emotional state impacts our children.

In these turbulent times, finding healthy ways to manage our own stress and regulate our emotions is more important than ever. By consciously choosing movement as a tool, we can not only prevent our own "dinosaur moments" but also model healthy coping mechanisms for our children. So, next time you feel that familiar surge of frustration, maybe try a few burpees before you… well, you know. It might just be the circuit breaker you need to navigate the moment with a little more grace, and a lot less roar.